Tuesday, June 28, 2011

On the road again.

The last few weeks, we have been preparing to go and bring some updates to sponsors. This is always such a blessing for us. Our first stop will be to Saint Andre Quebec. There is an incredible group of friends there that have supported the work in Central Asia since our very first trip. They have provided not just financial and prayer support, but they are always there to encourage us. Almost every project that we have entered into, they have been involved with . It has been a whole year since we have been there for a visit , so we are really looking forward to it. We will then be home for a couple days, then we will be going to a play called " The Russian" It is staring our very own Hannah.. you may remember her from the blog, she has made a couple trips with us. Then the LAMb team will be meeting for the week at Lynn and Ruby's cottage. That will be so nice to have a week with them. The cottage is only about 20 minutes from our house . This will be more then just a visit. We have a lot of work to do with David and Jayne. We have a very exciting project that we are working on with them, and we need to put some final touches on it. .. Then we are off to Espanola.
There are a lot of great things happening in Espanola. Some incredible people , and an incredible church that is always such a blessing to the work that we do. Oh and maybe we will even get a few worms wet. My Brother does not know it yet, but we will likely stop in for a visit there as well on our way home. Then we will be back home again by the 23.
The 23rd is a Missions Fest for central Ontario, and will be about an hour from our house. This will be about the 5th or 6th year that we will be attending.

I think that this is an important event, and I enjoy doing it. It gives us an opportunity to encourage people that are interested in short term trips. They see so many possibilities around them. There is a common misconception that you have to be with a big national church organization, of you need 4 years of bible collage training before you can go on the missions field.. I am sure all would help, but we show them that by connecting with quality organizations and by working with incredible people, that is not necessary. In the photo above, if you look closely, you will see the backs of a family that visited the booth last year, and visited us in Kyrgyzstan in the spring.
Then the next couple weeks is still up in the air... we have a few places that we would like to go. One is to California. We have a lot of supporters in CA. and some little friends from Tokmok there as well.. We are hoping to put a trip that direction together, but just need to get a handle on the finances first. As you know, we did a one year budget one year ago, and we are now down to the last few weeks. All in all, I think we did pretty well, but there are just so many variables to consider, It is looking like we will come in a couple thousand dollars over budget for the year .and our air miles don't register for about 6 weeks after travel, so until Julie goes back to work, it looks like things will be a little tight. Once we get a little closer, we will firm up our plans.
If you are anywhere along our route, we would love to come and see you... just let us know .

"It jumped right out of my pocket!"

I was taking Melody and Davina for a walk and I we went to the river to cross the foot bridge and my cell phone jumped out of my pocket and landed in the river. So I emptied my pockets and juped in, but I couldnt see the bottom and their was a lot of grass, so I was feeling for it with my feet. After about 10 or 15 minutes I gave up because I couldn't see anything and the water was really cold. So on our way home, the pastor was driving by and asked me what happened because I was all wet, so I told im the story and he went on his way and I went home. Then after about 20 minutes, the pastor came to our house and gave me my cell phone back and it still worked. He said he went to the river and asked around at the shashlik cafes by the river and a man there dove in farther down the river where it was over his head and found the cell phone.
And then pastor samat told the story in church.
ok I have to go now
its tea time

Monday, June 27, 2011

“Let him be neither mine nor yours, but divide him.”

We have always tried to remain some what neutral in the whole adoption issue as far as our work in the orphanages is concerned,. We have taken this stand so that we could continue to go into the orphanages and help the children with out being seen as a threat. In the last three years we have come to love these kids. especially for the 65 children that are waiting for the hold to be lifted. some in particular have a really special place in our hearts, and it may seem strange, but some we almost see as our own... so it is no wonder that this same feeling is evident in the orphanage workers that are caring for the kids every day. Just As we wish there was something that we could do, now even some of the orphanage workers and directors are starting to grow increasingly desperate with the situation... it appears that NO ONE wants this life for these kids yet they are still in a place of limbo. Over and over again we have seen different levels of government both side of the issue stand up and claim to be looking at the best interest of the children, yet they continue to sit and wait. Solomon would have been stumped at this one as it appears that both sides are good with the idea of simply cutting the baby in half... 1 Kings 3:26
Non of the powers that be realize the impact that their procrastination is having. I have seen first hand the needless loss of life as a result. We have sat in Hospitals and exam rooms with some of these kids as attempts are made to provide a level of care for them that can only be provided in a more advanced medical system.
Before returning to Kyrgyzstan in March, we decided to personally visit the families and the homes of children that have been or are waiting to be adopted from Kyrgyzstan... I can't begin to describe the anguish we felt as we drove into picture perfect surroundings and visited the future homes of children we know and love. We have seen there bed rooms and they play rooms.. we have held their toys and have listened to the hearts cry of the families waiting for them... and not just parents, but aunts and uncles, cousins and grand parents.. we have even visited with their neighbours... They say it takes a whole community to raise a child and yet we have entire communities waiting to take up the role, yet the children still wait. for 26 days 4 flights 5000 km of driving.. and the common factor for us was children and their "HOPE for a future.."
One image that continues to play over and over in our heads is a vision we had.. in a quaint picturesque little village in a farming community in the finger lakes district, we passed a road side ice cream shop. Across a large field we could see in the distance a few Victorian homes, one of which was waiting for one of our little friends to come home.. I shared with Julie the vision I had of our little friends riding his bike on a hot summer afternoon to this very spot to get an ice cream to bring to his dad in the fields..iv>
Words are not enough .. if they were the kids would be in loving homes by now... it doesn't help to stand up and scream... many have done that. At times like this, I think it is important to realize that not everything is in our control, nor can it be fixed by us.. but that does not mean that there is not a solution... everything else has been tried... how about this

Baby hospital update.

I have been working on a report for the Rotary club. They sponsored 23 beds for the Baby hospital and some of the cribs for the Maternity hospital. I put together a video showing the progress that has been made there in the last few year, it is really remarkable when you see the time line shortened up like this. The first time we walked into this hospital in 2009, things were so bad that the director was afraid to allow us to take any photo's. After the first round of renovations, they were not as concerned, but now, they are asking us to take photo's.
One of the dilemma's that they are facing is an incredible up swing in the number of patients that they see now. This Baby hospital is the place to go.. The rooms are now clean and well kept. the beds are better then the hotels, they have sheets and mattresses for those who need them, there is baby food for the babies that need it, and the families even receives a small welcome gift of a sweater or a new born baby pack. A far cry from the hospital we first walked into a couple years ago.

I remember bringing my friend Dave in to see the hospital . He was the first in a long line of friends and sponsors to take part. It seemed so overwhelming at the time.. the needs were so many , and we had such limited funds, but you know when you break it down into bite size pieces and be persistent, incredible things can happen.
If you watch the video you will notice that we said that there is so much more that is needed . That is true... The plumbing system is so old and the renovations we have done have just patched the real problem. In reality it looks like it will be another $10 000 to replace this . There was a time that a figure like this would have scares the tar out of me, but I have since come to realize that , "Its NOT my problem"... I would sure love to see it done, as well as 13 beds still needed to finish the maternity wing, but the reality is that I just need to be faithful and facilitate the work, and report on the progress and the completion. As far as the funds themselves.. that's not my business.. that is between one of our readers and God to figure out, but when ever either one lets us know, we will be ready to roll with more incredible blessings for the expecting Moms and sick babies of Kyrgyzstan.

Friday, June 24, 2011

Mercy or Justice ?

I have been thinking a lot about Mercy and Justice ... and the difference... It's funny we seem to have the feeling as a culture that Justice is some how more important then mercy. I looked around on the net to see what I could find . what it boils down to is mercy is forgiving someone or helping when it is not deserved, where as justice is doing what is right when some one is deserving or wronged !...

I have always had a soft spot when I see an injustice, and have a deep urge to step up.. It is what I learned from my father.. he was a defender of the underdog.. he told me one time that if you take the side of Justice, you will never loose because you have the favor of God on your side ...

Here is an example of that Justice in action from our recient trip to Kyrgyzstan .

..( if you are viewing this from FB, you may need to go directly to the blog by following this link to watch it )

As I watch this video, I become overwhelmed ... not by the show of Justice like you might think, but by the show of mercy. The mercy that God has shown me, to use me in all my faults to be a blessing to others.. the mercy that was shown to many of those helping us with this project.. to save them from a life of drugs and alcohol... totally un deserving, and lifting them to a place of doing justly....to show mercy and lift them from life in the orphanage system, and set them apart from those around them

The greatest of mercy and Justice is not Justice.. that is expected of us, it is the mercy that we have been given , and in turn share... it is mercy that has us reach out to those around us in need .. regardless of their storey... Mercy is the new beginning .. Mercy is a future with Him... We can do Justice... But I think it is only by understanding the mercy that was shown us that we can Do Justice right ... Until we understand the place of Mercy, how can we seek Justice.

In mercy the throne will be established; And One will sit on it in truth, in the tabernacle of David, Judging and seeking justice and hastening righteousness.....Isaiah 16:4-6

Friday, June 17, 2011

A friend is in need ..

I have sort of been off the grid for the last week. We are adjusting to the new time zone, the power outages, and trying to reclaim the house and garden from the jungle growing in around us. Bekah is off to be a Nanny for the summer for Jonah ( our grandson ) . We were on pins and needles last week when the kids made their trip to Alaska. they made all connecting flights .. not easy 4 flights and over 24 hours in the air, connecting in Moscow, New York and Seattle. This many connections on such a long journey is a challenge for even the veteran traveler, but for our four young students from Kyrgyzstan, it was an adventure they will not forget.

I have been getting ready to start posting again. there have been a lot of things happening since we left, and we have been inn constant contact with Emma and the rest of the team. I will start sharing over the next couple days. Today I was knocked back into reality... and not in a good way.

Since the time we started at the men's home, there has been a quiet group of volunteers that have been helping us there.

'They are friends of Larisa's, and when ever we needed anything, Larisa would call them. When it was time for a party and we wanted a celebration, Larisa would get them to come and sing and dance for the men... when there was renovations needed, larisa would call them and they would come and help her carry supplies.. when there was extra food needed, they would even volinteer to help her cook... they have been her extra set of hands.

I do not know them well myself, we have Larisa get the party or the event started, and we arrive part way through with our guests, then slip out before the event is over so that we can keep on a lower profile.... These are the people that we are working to elevate in there community. Yet like I say I don't know a whole lot about them .

Today I got some disturbing news from some friends who are still on the ground in Kyrgyzstan.

Dear John & Julie,

Greetings from Kyrgyzstan!

We had a great Children's Day with you all, that was a great lift of spirit for John and I. ....what a wonderful model for all.

Today, we met with Dennis, our 10th grader and his mom, Tatyana from School, through our chief accountant. Tatyana was surprised to see my John for she was expecting to see John Wright. She and her husband were the musicians for you at the village where you set up the water faucet.

Unfortunately we wish we have met under happier occasion. Tatyana came to borrow money for chemo for her cancer came back in the form of lymphoma. She previously had major surgery 4 years ago to have her reproductive system all removed. Now, the cancer is growing fast and causing pain in her legs and spreading now to her back. Surgery is not suitable for her, but chemo of some sort may help. She needs around $500 for some equipment and medicine - Her husband and her older son work in Russia and they cannot give her the money right away, may need 2 more months before they can raise the money. But she knows she is running against time.

We are short of funding ourselves lately with all the unexpected major expenses this year, still we like to help some. . John, can you also try to help her through by telling her story and her need. Of course, the even more important part is to lift her up with your prayer requests for her.

Attached is her photo. She is very slim and looks very pale and her faith in Him is still very strong and she says she believes He will heal her for He wants to use her.

God bless!

Love in Him,
Christa & John
We hear of a lot of needs, and we respond to more medical situations then you could imagine. We do not care who they are, what race religion or past a person has, we try to help everyone just the same.... BUT at times like this, when it is one of your own, it is hard. As you can imagine right now going through my head is that we were just there .. did I miss something, where we to go and see her, I have felt a nudge for some time to get this group of volunteers together and see what we could do for them... they have always been faithful, and have never in the four years we have worked with them asked for anything...

I need to do something with this , and quickly... Cancer is not something that waits until timing is right and funding is in place.. if we are going to be successful with this we need to act quickly... It may even be to late, but I an sitting here thinking about a word that came to me a couple months ago "

HELPING does not always change the outcome, but it does change how the outcome impacts those around us.

today we need to take some concrete steps to change the impact of this situation... our sister has been faithful... now it is our turn.
if you would like to help out, you can use the link below, when you review the donation you will see under purpose, "add special instructions to seller" please mark here "Tatyana chemo"

LAMb International USA is a 501(c)(3) tax-exempt Christian charity organization. At all times LAMb International USA retains ultimate authority to use contributions at our discretion for purposes consistent with our tax exempt purposes.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Back in Canada ...

The flights were un eventful. All smooth and all on time. It was impressive that we could travel half way around the world, and clear the customs in Canada with in 6 minutes of when expected. The only hitch was at each stop, it was necessary for us to "teach" the airline staff their job. They all wanted extra baggage charges, but being calm and firm seemed to do the trick. I did loose one fight, more because I was tired then anything. I noticed that they had water in the duty free shop in Bishkek, so I bought 6 bottles for the Moscow airport. but when we got to Moscow they said that we could not have them. When I pointed out that if they had been large bottles of Vodka like the other passengers were caring , they would not have a problem... but that just brought on a whole bunch of shouting by her , so I realized this was going no where, so when she said that we could have one each, it seemed like a not bad compromise... But i am sure I could have won that one if I tried harder. Delta admitted that Aeroflot should have checked our bags to Canada, and they should be free, but since Aeroflot refused, then they would charge $35 per bag. But they soon learned the errors of their ways, and we were on our way.
We arrived home to a major storm that has knocked out power to most of our area. It was just 3:00 this morning that we got power back.. that meant that we had no Internet, no water , and now lights... But it did give us a good excuse to sleep..
Today we are dealing with a few issues..the big one is our van.. We are please that it is hanging on for us, but we know it will not last long.. it has around 300 000 km, and the body is falling apart.. last summer I got a few cans of that foam insulation and sprayed it into all the holes. then when it dried , I cut off the access and sprayed it with spraypaint... from a distance it did not look to bad. But now things are a little worse. It sounds a bomb ready to explode.. or like a swing machine with a bent needle. Then there is the muffler, and the heating system that will not seem to shut off. I was in to town to get a price to fix the engine, and figured that $2500 was about twice what the car is worth. I have a friend that has a car lot. He has offered a real deal on the same van, two years newer, and half the millage, and the body in good shape. It looks like it will be $1000 down and another $1500 to pay off as we can. We have a lot of traveling to do over the next couple months, so we will have to bite the bullet and go for it.
It was great to see Benjamin and Rachel, and of course Jonah. We went for a visit last night. Bekah has been looking for a Summer job, and it is looking like she will move to Ben and Rachel's and be a nanny for them for the summer so that they can pick up some extra shifts. So its looking like it will be down to just Julie and I for the summer..
We are going to take it easy for the weekend, then I have to start working on reports for the last few months... Already have been in touch with many of our sponsors, but need to do some reports, and prepare presintations. We also have a few new projects that we are very excited about, so stay tuned.
Over the next week, I will be sorting photo's. There are a lot of cool stories that we simply did not have time to share so we will play a little catch up.

Tuesday, June 07, 2011

Final hours...

Last fall when returning to Kyrgyzstan after the riots, war, and ethnic cleansing, a lot of people asked us if things were different. I shared at that time that there seemed to be an underlying tension and that Kyrgyzstan was a different place. Many people had migrated from the south, and with them came a more “fundamentalist" flavor to life here.

I remember walking through the bazaar and really recognizing it, And if I am totally honest, this small town Canadian country grown boy was at times feeling a little uncomfortable. There was one store in the bazaar that I can distinctly remember looking at the owner, and thinking how much Tokmok was changing.. I did one of those ..pretend not to look... I am sure that he was doing the same thing, because unlike most, he did not stop and stare at me either.

But I could feel such a tension about him... fast forward to last night, a few hours before we were to leave, I got a text message and subsequent call from him... He wanted to say good bye, he said that he is so pleased to know us, and that he is thankful for all that we are doing for his people.. he then went on to say that personally, he is blessed that we are his friend.

After he hung up, I started thinking and wondering how we have made such an impact on him, but then remembered that one day in the bazaar we had heard his wife was home with bad allergies, so we gave them a package of allergy medication, and went on our way.... To the person who sent that pack, we may never know how that one small package of allergy meds will change both his view and ours of the future... thank you...

Some one else came to the house to say good bye... They said that they are not at all concerned about saying good bye because they have absolutely no doubt we will be back, and that they will be praying for us as we wait to see how this will happen. They said that they see so many NGO's and missionaries that come and go. Most tell a story of Christianity.,She then said that from what she knows of Jesus , he was not a respecter of persons.. he treated all the same , and they have watched what our family has been doing, and can understand that now.. She said that as she watches our work here, she sees us working with every nationality and religion, but what struck her the most is that she watched how the Mayors, governors and Government ministers want to have their pictures taken with us, but it is the children in the dumps and the orphanage that we know by name. She said that what is happening here is not a normal thing and that it has taught them all so much...

Once again this has been a real conformation to us that we are on the right track... now we must just be patient and wait to see whats next...
It was such a hectic few days as we prepared to go, so much to do.... when we got to a meeting at the Red River orphanage, the director had been detained in Bishkek, and we had to wait for her for about an hour. So we went over and say on the side of the irrigation canal with our feet in the water.. It was no time at all before the kids gravitated over to us and began enjoying the visit as well... It was nice.. they sat with us and played the remember when game... remember when you took us to the Hot springs,.. remember when we went to the circus, Oh remember when we got the new TV and furniture for the family room, remember when we went to a restaurant after getting glasses...Remember the birthday parties... so many good memories... but really what they were saying was we will always remember that you love us ....

Sunday, June 05, 2011

Exceedingly and Abundantly

Oct 2005, I was part of a team that did a home make over for an old one legged man.  Today we returned to his home for a visit .. I have not seen him for over  a year.  It was such a blessing to see the smile on his face when he saw us.
      Next we went to see our old Kyrgyz Babushka who lost her home in a fire.  I will post some photos when the Internet is back up.   The house is absolutely amazing .  He family was able to bring her some tushuks and blankets.  they also bought her a new hope chest.. suiting I think.  She has also bought a wardrobe and made new curtains for the apartment.  I just love the colours in her house . She did such a good job with the design.  But most of all, you simply could not get the smile off her face,.. Then she showed us the new water heater that we had installed .. she kept telling me in amazement that it was automatic... it actually turns itself on and off to keep the water at the right temperature...  I realized that she did not have hot water before.. There is a blessing when you help some one out of a difficult situation, but there is an extra blessing when you set them on higher ground then then they started, never mind dreamed of. Oh wait a second.. "Exceedingly and abundantly more then we could ask or Imagine "  this is what we have been a part of.. and it sure feels good.  

Saturday, June 04, 2011

In HIS hands

As we are coming down to the end of our stay it is so easy to get overwhelmed with some of the needs that we have on our hearts.  Many are so important to the individuals we will be helping, and others may not at first glance seem as important, but are the connections and ties that give us the favour that we are experiencing.  

   Just today we were at the men's home teaching English.  It was a little earlier then usual as we were also helping with a children's day party in another village.   Then there was a flurry of excitement, and we were asked to come to the dining room .  There we were sat down with the rest of the staff, and the minister of health ( I think) arrived with a previous director to introduce the new director.  After the introductions, we had a quick meeting to introduce each other.  The minister asked us directly and personally to please continue to support the home, and particular the immediately need of the dining room and kitchen .  We assured them that we are committed to working with Larisa, and that we have been waiting until the new director is in place before beginning.  We now have a meeting on Monday to discuss further projects and how the ministry can be a part.  I am thinking back to a time when we first arrived in Central Asia... any one from the government was referred to as  " the checking people " , and that was our signal to go quietly in a room somewhere out of sight and hunker down until they left.  Today it seems to be the opposite.  rather then hiding us away somewhere , we are dragged out and paraded in front of the "checking people " 
   Once again I found myself in an important meeting , standing there in my shorts and a t shirt, and my rubber flip flops... I explained that we were dressed for work , I think he understood... 
 As we talked to the minister, he said that he was very aware of the work that the LAMb team has been doing in Kyrgyzstan, and that he is very pleased with the help, not just here , but the training that Ruby and her team have been providing may of his  people .  He also said that the men's home is not the kind of place that is normally easy to find people willing to help, but he has seen what has been accomplished since his last visit 1 1/2 years ago, and it is evident to him that the LAMb team are friends of Kyrgyzstan.  He then shared again how important the renovations are to them . 
  It has always been clear to us that as long as we continue to work threw Larisa and bring improvements to the home, her place in the home will be secure.  this is vital to us for every thing that we do here at the home, and if we are going to continue to have unprecedented access to the home, it will be through the efforts of Larisa.
   Its just an example I guess of how just one project has far reaching repercussions. and yet we seem to be burdened with so many... I guess the thing is that we have to just be ready and willing to do out part when the time is right , until them , we simply have to put them into Gods hands.  
 "Never worry about anything. Instead, in every situation let your petitions be made known to God through prayers and requests, with thanksgiving.  Then God's peace, which goes far beyond anything we can imagine, will guard your hearts and minds "

Please join us as we add a few of our current needs to that list...

-new septic system for TB hospital.. currently running in open trenches
- three girls just became orphans .. need monthly support and scholarship and house repair
-blind society needs computer
- young girls needs sponsorship to attend hillsong college in Ukraine
-heart operation for small girl in hospital 
-orphan moved to Germany for heart operation
-little girl needs eye surgery to remove skin grown over eyes
-Orphanage needs renovations and activity room com pleated 
-self sustainability project for Dayspring and rehab Centre
-IUCA students need scholarships 
-more school money because of increased tuition
-legless dancers to competition in Turkey 
-men's home floor in dining room
-men's home finish upstairs shower room in the hospital section
-13 more beds for Maternity hospital
-water system repaired for the hospital 
-beds sheets and blankets for TB hospital 
-orlofka summer kids program 
-tatchka driver medical needs 
- home for Samats family 
-portable dental clinic 
- Home for the Uzbec families
- 20 tons of coal for winter  for families in need 
- 6 tons of coal for DaySpring
-15 tons of coal for seniors home
- young girl needs an arm 
-surgery to relieve the pressure on a young mans brain

I am sure there are many more when I start going back through our notes, but these are just off the top of my head.  Each and every one has a person or a group of people attached to them that have little else to HOPE for .. for many, this is the last place, and now they stand !    I know that they may not all get done. I sure am glad that my responsibility only lies in sharing the need. the rest as I tell our friends here ,is out of my hands.  they are in HIS.

Thursday, June 02, 2011


  Ones again the blogs are down, as is the sight that does the e-checks.. fortunately pay pal is still up and running .   It just gets frustrating.  but that's not the only thing that is frustrating.  We have been helping our Tatchka driver.. he has liver damage from drinking. If we can get him detoxed and a little healthier, he can go to Jengish, and stands a good chance, but that just seems so far off.  Because of his health issues, he can not go into a detox centre, and yesterday he started to have hallucinations.. when we got to the hospital, he was trying to push his bed around the room, thinking that it was his cart... not surprisingly, they looked almost the same... any ways the hospital can not keep him because of this.  After spending a couple hours driving by ambulance to other hospitals to try to admit him, they decided that he is too sick, so they will just send him home.  
   This was not surprising to us, but it is upsetting.  the night before we had experience with this when the vise mayor and police chief heard we were in the village, they cam to us and asked for help. The hospital had just dumped a men in the parking lot in the centre of town.  he is close to death and they did not want to deal with him. When were able to make some calls, and get him admitted to another hospital.. It pains me that this is something that the mayor and the chief of police can not do, yet some foreigner can make a call and get help.  These two men had such concern for this poor sick man , they were respectful and caring toward him.  This is what we strive to show here , The people are changing, yet the system continues to do injustice to those trying to survive in it. 
   All te time this is going on, our phones continue to right , it is almost panic on the end of the phone as people are calling with needs .  They know we are going soon and are desperate to get us to come and see them.  I have tried to explain that we will continue to try to help them when we return to Canada, and that we have so many here in Kyrgyzstan that will continue to help, and share their stories with us, but for some reason, this time that seems to be little comfort.  
   I also get so frustrated with the unjustness of people that think that they are doing good, but are so counter productive.  We know of a young girl that was a victim of bride knapping , she was beaten and held against her will , after breaking free from this 13 years later, and starting a new life, a missionary has interfered, and has told her that she must go back to this man and ask him to take her back as he feels that this constitutes a marrage... I try so hard to be culturally sensitive , but I have NO TIME for stuff like this.. Live is such a delicate thing, and must be treated with such care and respect.. something that is in short supply some times .   I sure hope today is a better day .... Putting on our armor today and heading to battle  

Wednesday, June 01, 2011

When Helping Hurts

A fine young boy we have come to love, sat across the table from us in a caffet today... We new he needed something, and could see the pain in his face as he fought for the words and courage to speek.. finaly with some coxing, he said ... " we are out of flour, and all I have been able to earn from colecting mettle is 200 som.. we need 300 ($7) more or we will have no electricity...
Just seeing his face, I could feel his pain.. Not sure who wanted to cry more , him or me...
With gut renching pain I told him I could not give him what he needed, but I would provide him a job so he could earn it... In side I am screaming at myself " WHAT IS GOING ON..YOU JERK>>> MAKING A KID WORK FOR FOOD" but as I looked back across the table and saw one of the biggest looks of relief and joy I have ever seen on his face... Today he received hope & DIGNITY.... It pained him to think about asking , to make the call and set up the meeting, and the whole way to town, he was in knots... he knew I would help, there was no doubt, He just did not want to have to ask. Everything in me wants to tell him it's ok he does not have to work it off, but I guess I know that it has to be this way... This is when "HELPING HURTS"
I spoke to Larisa tonight .. she often helps us with this families needs .. I shared our conversation with her and asked if he and is brother could come to her house and weed her garden for her.. She had the same look of relief as our young friend.. she then said while fighting back the tears that she has just been so busy, that just today she was saying that she can not keep up her garden this year, and has no idea what she will do...
I watch and see how the pieces begin to fall together, I realize that our young friend is not happy that he has work, but he is happy that he can return a favor and help us, and I realize that Larisa is not happy that some one is going to weed her garden, but that her prayers were heard and answered...
There is another time when Helping Hurts... Our friends David and Jayne come to help... tonight they are hurting. They will be leaving for the airport in 15 minutes... I know how they are feeling , we have tried everything, and it is never easy... In one more week we will be following them. this season is drawing to a close.. We prepare to leave with more needs and concerns then we have ever had before in such a short time, I know that like our friends, Our Journey Continues ...