I have sat down several times to post some more stories from our time in Central Asia, but hit a wall every time. There is a story there that I do not want to tell, but I can not think about another without this one coming to the surface.
One of the things that we have done at Possibilities International is to recognize the value of education, and even more the value of being able to speak English...... This skill will give the kids an incredible advantage when they hit the workforce. It also makes things a little more difficult for us. The stories we tell should always be written in a way that is respectful to the kids, but also in a way that will not expose hurts when they read these posts for them selves. I guess it is the old two edged sword... We want to share the stories for our readers that will invoke the very emotions that keep our hearts captive in Central Asia, but I know that one day soon, those whom we are trying to help will be reviewing these articles. This I have thought about for some time and have expected. That is why many of our stories have remained vague or remain untold.
There is one other thing that I did not anticipated.... That is the effect that it would have on Me.... I have heard many of their stories as they have been translated, but Now they are much harder to hear.... Altynai was able to break through that one barrier that until now had protected us... While we where there, she learned to communicate with us in English... She shared her story with us .... her joys and her sorrows. She moved in with us and became one of our family.... and when we left, she was able to tell us just how she felt. I know we have done all that we could to make sure that she has a strong network of people around her to help, but I wish we could do more. She is 19 years old and has taken an active role in raising her brothers and sisters for her whole life..not to mention that she is no dummy., but for a time, she could let that all go and just put her trust in us.... she could let go and experience things that she should have experienced a long time ago.... When ever we would discuss options , like picking out this back to school outfit, with her she would say ... "Please you just tell me what to do.".... We would always help her to sort things out in her own mind, but I am recognizing now that she just needed a break..... As we have arrived here in Kiev, we have found ourselves feeling the same way..."Ed, you just tell us what to do." ..... God gives us the strength to deal with what we must, and the wisdom to make the decisions that we have to.
Altynai... Trust God ... and rest in His ability to make the right choices for your life.... I have shared with many the advise that Pastor Ron shared with us a long time ago... He said " Put your faith in Gods ability to lead... not your ability to follow. "