Home is not here !

I appear to be having a hard time with the whole jet leg and culture shock this trip.. I can hardly bring myself to sit down and start organizing my thoughts and experiences... So many thoughts and images have been playing on my emotions. I just got an email from my friend Ed...He drops me nuggets from time to time from his years of experience ..This is what he wrote me today..
Strange isn't it? "Home" is not home ... and "home" is not Home. Now you really realize that your "home" is not here ...The second I read that, I understood not just what he meant , but how I have been feeling... Struggling to hang onto a home in Canada, and build a home in Central Asia . In Canada we have so much, but comparatively speaking, we do nothing.. we just struggle to maintain... In Central Asia , we have nothing, yet we continue to impact thousands ...
I am in Canada now struggling to write the storey of a young girl named Aizada who lost her father 6 months ago, and 3 months ago, her mothers brain tumor left her mother almost blind... her House is ready to collapse , in fact one or two more rains, and they will be homeless... In Central Asia, I would be there myself if I had to , rebuilding the walls of her life... money or no money, I would find a way to help... and here I am now in Canada , and I can hardly get the energy to tell the storey... I guess I know that I have 50 more just like this one... where do you start....
I had a little snap back to reality today... I spoke with Altynai... she excitedly told me about some of the projects like the hospital renovations that have been completed this week... she then shared that her brothers are on there way tomorrow to Aizada's house... They know that I am out of money right now, but they understand the need, and know that I have a burden for her and want to help...
Altynai's family loves their new apartment, but they understand what Ed is talking about... because there "home" is not here either.....