Sunday, June 20, 2010

Fathers Day

Happy fathers day to all you fathers out there. I hope you have a great day. I got a nice shirt from Benjamin, a couple things from Bekah and I phone call from Emma and the girls in Kiev.
Fathers day has , for a long time now, had a bit of an edge to it. Since the passing of my own father, I have found it to be a day that I reminisce that much more. I can remember about 10 years ago telling myself that I needed to make a conscious effort to be happy on this day.. Funny that a day that is designed to make you happy is a day that requires effort. I realized that for the sake of my kids, and so that they would have the same fond memories I had, I needed to put out the effort... I have three wonderful kids that I am so proud of. I am not sure if I have shared this before, but there was a time about 14 of 15 years ago that we were considering adoption. We were not certain if we should adopt, or if we should be available foster parents for sibling groups... While we were trying to decide, we forged ahead with the classses and home studies. We passed everything, and jumped through all the hoops, and came to the place where we needed to make the final decision which way we would go. We were seeking and waiting for clarification on this... That Sunday night we had a special speaker come visit. He was a very old and very wise man. He almost seemed so old that you would wonder if he was following everything that was going on... We Spoke to him that night.. we told him that we had an important decision that we needed to make.... He began to speak, asking for direction as to which of these two paths we were to follow.. then suddenly he stopped and looked up at us... He told us that we were to go no further with this, and that neither was an option.. he said that we were not to be parents to just one or two more, but that there would be hundreds that would call us Mom and Dad.
Like I had said, today I had a phone call from Emma to wish me a happy Fathers day , but she was the last one on the phone after her two "sisters"... Last Chirstmas you all helped us celebrate Christmas for over 2000 of our kids . Now there are probably only about 200 of them that I know well, only about 100 I could name... and truthfully, only about 50 that I could name without having to think about it, but that's not bad since right now we only have Embekah at home while Bekema is away...hahaha...
I know how this can be a hard time for me, then I imagine what this day means for these kids that may have been abused , neglected, abandoned ... I have heard stories that I could never publish.. yet for them when they think of Fathers day , they can think past all that, and get on the phone and say happy Fathers day... we love you Dad .. thank you for being our father... I guess you never know really what kind of impact you are having ...
At the same time I remember little ones like Sophia who after all these years,
I can not even get her to look at me... Maybe one day she will understand a Fathers love...

1 comment:

Hilary Marquis said...

Happy Father's Day, John! You've made me cry...again :)